Latest Stories
Most recently published stories in Humor.
Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Booyah!
Dear Professor Donkeldong, I would like to formally apologize. Last night I snuck into your office. I sat in your chair and poured myself three fingers of Scotch from the bottle you’ve got stashed in the top desk drawer. Then I helped myself to your private library.
By Leslie Writesabout 2 hours ago in Humor
Godfrey de Bouillon
Godfrey de Bouillon was born around 1060 into the French nobility in the Boulogne region of France. His father served William the Conqueror, survived the Battle of Hastings but died quite young leaving a very young Godfrey and his two brothers with their mother for their upbringing. Godfrey began his military training around about the age of ten and became a proficient horse rider, swordsman and bowman.
By Alan Russellabout 13 hours ago in Humor
Why the Rich Never Tell White Lies After Labor Day
Every year, as the last rosé is chilled, the final seaplane taxis off to Aspen, and Labor Day folds its socially acceptable linen napkin, an ancient tradition quietly stirs among the elite: They stop telling white lies. Why you ask?
By The Pompous Postabout 14 hours ago in Humor
The Lavender Tsunami and the Great Pool Slide Barricade
Dear Mary, Please accept my most sincere apologies for the state of the downstairs guest bathroom. I know you specifically asked me to keep the “Sanctuary Suite” pristine for your mother’s arrival this evening, and I truly regret that the Egyptian cotton towels now smell faintly of low-tide and desperation.
By Meko James about 15 hours ago in Humor
How I Ruined Christmas
To the love of my life, I’m unfortunately unable to marry you. As I have had something that I needed to confess for the past six months. That I have done something so vile and so disgusting that I cannot say it to your face. Writing it out for you is one of the most difficult things I have done in the past three years we’ve known each other. Leaving it on your pillow in the hopes that you’ll see it after I don’t come to the altar.
By Raphael Fontenelleabout 17 hours ago in Humor
Mirror, Mirror on the Feed:
The digital war between Brenda and Maya doesn't take place on a battlefield; it plays out in the saturated, filtered trenches of Social Media, fueled by cheap wine and a level of resentment that could power a small metropolitan area.
By Meko James about 21 hours ago in Humor
OOPS!
I saw it in slow motion, Angie's arm going up into the air, her hand gripping her ice cream cone. The cone and ice cream separating from her hand, from each other. Tumbling down to the pavement in unceremonious somersaults, like an Olympic diver who had gotten drunk before their big moment.
By Raine Fieldera day ago in Humor
Reguarding Your Car
I want to begin by saying I’m sorry about your car. I understand that, at a basic level, it is frustrating to come outside in the morning and find that your vehicle is no longer in the exact condition—or location—you left it in. That’s completely fair. I take responsibility for the initial incident, which, to be clear, was a minor misjudgment on my part while moving it a short distance.
By shallon gregerson2 days ago in Humor
An Apology for Bringing the Squirrel into Church
Dear Members of First Self-Righteous Church, I write this with a humbled heart, a sore back, and a memory that replays in vivid, chaotic detail. I must apologize for bringing that squirrel into your church last Sunday. Every shriek, hallelujah, and blush-worthy confession began with my decision. I take full responsibility.
By Tim Carmichael2 days ago in Humor
The MAGA-thon: Spite, Saturated Fats, and the Spin Cycle of Doom
The air in the "Spin Cycle" studio at the local gym was thick with the scent of organic citrus floor cleaner and the collective, desperate sweat of a dozen people trying to outrun their own bad decisions and mortality. But for Brenda, it smelled like treason. It smelled like a deep-state, gluten-free, avocado-toast-eating, woke communist conspiracy, that was personally trying to steal her breath and destroy her life.
By Meko James 3 days ago in Humor
