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Emphasis πŸ’”

Fighting my Demons Freestyle

By Lightning Bolt ⚑Published about a year ago β€’ Updated 11 months ago β€’ 1 min read
shattered & shocked ⚑

I get my feelings hurt

Because I need a hug and I feel disconnected

Then I get angry and act the fool

Making it far less likely I'll get the hugs I need

My behavior is crippling, ridiculous, unpredictable, self-defeating

I sit and I stew and I smolder for hours over little things

Then I blow up when everything boils over

I have no one to talk to about my problems (⚑>challenges<βš‘πŸ‘)

I'm told I need another friend

But where do I find a friend?

I'm far too old to meet one on a playground

And if I have another friend

___and they hurt my feelings

_______Will I act the fool with them?

And then it's POOF...πŸ’¨πŸ’¨

πŸ’¨πŸ’¨ πŸ’¨πŸ’¨ >Gone<

⚑

The man I love wants to leave me

He's sane.

I'm not.

He's put up with too much of my shit {my mood swings}

How many times have I told him that I'm sorry?

Too many times for him to care anymore

I tell him I'm better off alone when I'm mad

Then...

When I'm over that mania, I know I'll never be better off without him!

Will he give me a dozenth 'second' chance?

🀷

He was already doing that and then I fucked up again!!!

I'm my own worst enemy

πŸ’™-πŸ’š=πŸ’”βš‘

I love him.

(period/headline/ total emphasis)

4ever & always

__________________Bolt ⚑

Original story☝️ by ©️William Markly O'Neal II, 2024 - All rights reserved ⚑

Free Verseheartbreaksad poetryStream of Consciousness

About the Creator

Lightning Bolt ⚑

Bolt ⚑ aka Bill, a bizarre bisexual bipolar alliterative epileptic sexy odd β™’ Aquarian Taco Bell Futurist ~ Author of humor, poetry, history, sci fi, & horror.

4-Time Challenge Winner! 1, 2, 3, 4! (+1?🀞)

I am shock therapy.⚑ Subscribing risks electrocutionβ†―.

Reader insights

Nice work

Very well written. Keep up the good work!

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Comments (5)

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  • Kodahabout a year ago

    The cycle of hurt and regret, believe me, I understand. I hope your journey heals you every day, sending you lots of love your way!! πŸŒŸπŸ’πŸ’Œ

  • Sid Aaron Hirjiabout a year ago

    sounds like complex PTSD. It sucks when you feel so hopeless-hugs

  • Tiffany Gordonabout a year ago

    Praying! πŸ™πŸΎ Hugs 2 u Brilliant Bill!

  • Shirley Belkabout a year ago

    Just ask for a hug....sending you one now!!!

  • My heart goes out to you πŸ₯Ί Sending you lots of love and hugs ❀️

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