Betrayal & Bonds

"I'm sorry," my brain wrung out like a towel

fiercly squeezing, coiling, till dry

deluging pressure behind my flickering eyes

begrudgingly, I try to hide,

but shame resides

like writhing weeds inside

squirming through masked memories

of scratchy pillows pressed over me

rearranging my reality as a fallacy

"it couldn't be..."

betrayal at the hands of thy roots

giver of life, stealer of youth

fear, a force field

denial, its partner

pinning me to my damning, selfish corner

shadows over me

questions toiled me

but within lied these lies disguised as loyalty

a rotted grapevine tangled too many times

twisting his shackles to become mine

for releasing the truth was to admit that I knew

to fracture the image that I had clung to

I am one with the grime of this guilt

a prison of regret that I have built

filled with filth of pleading the fifth that day

when the monster got away

because of all of the things I couldn't say